stjorthotic Chapter 1 At 3 a.m., even the Great Sage was using online loans.
Chapter 1 At 3 a.m., even the Great Sage was using online loans.
Huaguo Mountain at three in the morning.
Lin Chen stuffed the last bite of the dry steamed bun into his mouth, chewing it with a crunching sound. His phone vibrated again in his back pocket. It had been seventeen days, and Brother Wang's debt collection calls hadn't stopped.
He didn't look. Nor did he dare to look.
The WeChat message from three minutes ago is still swirling in my mind:
"Xiao Lin, you can run away, but you can't hide. I know exactly where you live, where your mother lives, and even which company your ex-girlfriend works for. If you don't have the money by midnight tonight, I'll make sure you suffer social death."
Lin Chen swallowed hard, choking and patting his chest. "I'm practically on the verge of physical death, what's there to be afraid of in terms of social death!"
Debt: 4.2 million. Bank card balance: 0.5 yuan. Credit card: Maxed out. Online loan: Overdue for N days.
Twenty-seven years old, five years out of college, started three businesses. The first two were small profits, making me a little proud. The third was a complete disaster; I went all in and ended up in deep trouble. Now I don't even know where I'll get the money for tomorrow's bread.
He looked up at the moon; tonight's moon was fucking weird.
He had been to this place when he was a child. It was a wild scenic spot in Huaguo Mountain, which was originally planned to be developed, but the owner ran away with his sister-in-law, and it was abandoned. Now only a few faded artificial mountains remain, and a crooked-necked stone monkey squats in the weeds, its face so weathered by the wind and rain that it is no longer recognizable.
Lin Chen found a sheltered stone ledge to sit on and took out his phone to calculate the bill again.
Suddenly a sigh came from the side.
The sigh was short, but it sent a chill down Lin Chen's spine.
It wasn't because it was eerie. It was because the sorrow in that sigh was so real, exactly like those men who couldn't pay their mortgages, whose wives had run away, who had been fired by their bosses, and who were squatting by the roadside smoking in silence, and myself at that moment.
At 3 a.m., in an abandoned scenic area, eight kilometers from the nearest residential area.
How could there be anyone else besides him?
Lin Chen slowly turned his head.
Something was crouching on the large rock to the left.
He was about 1.3 meters tall, dressed in golden armor, with a red cloak edged in fur, and two feathers on his head fluttering in the wind. He had a hairy face, a thunder god's mouth, and golden pupils. He was staring intently at a mobile phone, his face scrunched up in worry.
A long, furry tail drooped under the rock, its tip unconsciously sweeping the ground with a swishing sound.
Lin Chen blinked.
His first reaction wasn't surprise or fear that there were people in this godforsaken place, but rather: This guy's cosplay is too professional.
The golden armor didn't look like plastic; it was heavy and felt like solid metal. The facial hair looked real, even the wrinkles around the eyes and the downy hair around the mouth were incredibly lifelike.
He moved closer to the guy and subconsciously glanced at the other's phone screen.
Holy crap, this phone is so old even a dog wouldn't use it. There's a thin crack in the bottom right corner of the screen. Is this guy even poorer than me? The screen is lit up; it's a WeChat group chat interface.
The group name made Lin Chen's eyes widen in surprise.
"Monkey Troop Debt Collection Group Chat (698 monkeys)"
The latest news is still popping up:
"Great Sage, the bananas for the monkey troop haven't arrived yet this month? We're almost out of food!" "Great Sage, the baby monkeys are crying from hunger!" "Great Sage, we still owe money for Er Ya's formula; Mommy Monkey said she's taking the babies away." "Great Sage, if you don't reply soon, we'll flood your screen!"
Immediately afterwards, hundreds of messages appeared on the screen in a row:
"Great Sage, we're hungry."
At the very top of the chat box, there's a large, highlighted red text!
"This month's food expenses shortfall: 800,000."
Lin Chen stood there, stunned, and remained silent for three seconds.
He glanced at Sun Wukong. Sun Wukong was still staring at his phone, head down. He clicked on the online loan page, looked at it for a long time, did some calculations, and figured the interest rate was a bit too high, so he exited! His brows were furrowed so deeply they could trap a mosquito.
He glanced at it again. The guy still didn't look up, and its tail was sweeping the ground faster and faster; it was clear it was really getting anxious.
He looked at his phone again. The group chat had 698 members, and their monthly food expenses amounted to 800,000 yuan.
My goodness! What is this food? Eating this much money in a month? Wait, is this... Sun Wukong (the Monkey King)?
Is it really Sun Wukong, the Monkey King? The Monkey King who wreaked havoc in the Heavenly Palace? The Monkey King who went on the journey to the West to obtain Buddhist scriptures?
I timidly asked him, "Are you really Sun Wukong?" I reached out and touched his tail; it didn't feel fake.
"You're sick, it's none of your business! Want me to perform the 72 Transformations? Sure, but you'll have to pay. I'm short on cash right now."
"I don't have any money. I think I'll pass."
At three in the morning, in an abandoned scenic area, the legendary Monkey King squatted on a rock with me, worrying about money together.
The absurdity far exceeded the seventeen debt collection calls he received today, and far exceeded the four million two hundred thousand yuan in debt he owed.
Lin Chen cleared his throat and tentatively said, "Um... I saw your message."
Sun Wukong shuddered reflexively, nearly dropping his phone. He caught it hastily, then abruptly turned his hairy face, his golden pupils filled with vigilance. His voice was muffled, carrying a bluffing ferocity:
"So what if I saw it? What's it to you? A mere mortal dares to interfere in my business?"
Lin Chen wasn't intimidated by him; instead, he moved closer.
He stared at Sun Wukong's outfit: the chainmail on his golden armor was cracked in several places, the collar of the inner lining was worn white and had several patches; the hem of his cloak was covered with mud and grass clippings; the soles of his shoes were worn thin, and the old cotton cloth inside could be vaguely seen.
The Monkey King, who once wreaked havoc in the Heavenly Palace, now seems poorer than this man who is drowning in debt.
A crazy and outrageous thought popped into Lin Chen's mind, but upon further reflection, it seemed inexplicably reasonable:
Since we already owe 4.2 million, it doesn't matter if we owe a little more, right? We're not afraid of getting bitten by lice.
"Your monkey," he began, his tone unusually sincere, even tinged with sympathy, "eats 800,000 a month?"
Sun Wukong was clearly taken aback. He paused for a moment, his golden pupils flashing, then slumped down, letting out an even heavier sigh.
"That's right, bananas have gone up in price. Last year they were 51 yuan a pound, this year they're 120 yuan, more than double the price."
"You're raising 698 monkeys all by yourself?"
"It's not 698; there are family members too. Including the newborn baby monkeys, there are a total of 1200," Sun Wukong corrected, his tone a mix of pride and worry. "They're all clever monkeys, with huge appetites, three meals a day, and they're picky eaters. They don't like artificially ripened ones, saying they have no taste; they insist on naturally ripened ones, which are more expensive."
Lin Chen almost burst out laughing.
These monkeys are picky eaters, even when it comes to bananas.
He swallowed the words back. He could tell that there was no complaint in Sun Wukong's tone, only a simple anxiety, like a man in charge of a household, calculating the family's monthly expenses, worrying about how to feed his family well and meet everyone's needs as much as possible.
Who would have thought that the Victorious Fighting Buddha, who once wreaked havoc in the Heavenly Palace and didn't even put the Jade Emperor in his eyes, would now be frowning under the moonlight, worrying about a shortfall of 800,000 in food expenses?
He leaned back against the stone wall, looked up at the moon, and said casually, "So, the Heavenly Court doesn't pay salaries?"
Lin Chen turned his head and looked at him seriously: "You, the Victorious Fighting Buddha, who was so powerful back then, how did you end up like this?"
Sun Wukong wasn't angry; he just twitched the corner of his mouth, revealing a bitter smile, as if he'd been cornered.
"Back when I, Old Sun, caused trouble in Heaven, it wasn't the Heavenly Court that was causing trouble; it was them withholding the monkey food from my Flower Fruit Mountain and bullying my little monkeys. Later, after I finished the journey to the West with Tang Sanzang and became a Buddha, I thought that at least these little monkeys could live a good life and no longer go hungry. Who knew..."
He paused, shook his head, and spoke with a weary tone:
"In this world, it's not just ordinary people who have it tough; even immortals have it hard."
Lin Chen fell silent. A sudden flash of inspiration struck him!
He suddenly stood up, patted the dirt off his bottom, walked over to Sun Wukong, squatted down, and looked directly into those golden eyes.
"Great Sage, my name is Lin Chen. I'm a mortal burdened with 4.2 million in debt, and I don't even know where I'll get my food money for tomorrow."
He spoke frankly and made no attempt to hide anything.
Sun Wukong raised an eyebrow, a look of surprise flashing in his eyes. He didn't speak, just looked at him quietly, as if waiting for him to continue.
Lin Chen grinned, a laugh that was both somewhat manic and resolute, as if he had nothing to lose.
"But I have an idea that would allow me to stop worrying about the 800,000 yuan every month, and also ensure that the monkeys of Flower Fruit Mountain can eat top-quality, naturally ripened bananas every day, so they won't go hungry anymore."
Sun Wukong's body visibly stiffened for a moment.
Those golden pupils narrowed slightly, a hint of barely perceptible expectation appearing in their eyes.
Lin Chen stretched out his hand, pointed to the desolate hilltop at his feet, and said with certainty:
"Isn't this your territory? Flower Fruit Mountain is famous throughout the world; countless people know about the Flower Fruit Mountain of the Monkey King."
The moonlight shone on the entire Flower and Fruit Mountain, revealing the dilapidated artificial hills, the desolate trails, the dried-up artificial waterfall, and the crooked-necked stone monkey—everything looked so ruined and desolate.
But in Lin Chen's eyes, these were not trash, nor were they ruins.
It's all money!
It was the hope that could turn things around for both him and Sun Wukong.
"Develop a scenic area." He spoke each word clearly and firmly. "Not this kind of amateurish tourist spot, but a legitimate 5A-level scenic area, with tickets, cultural and creative products, guesthouses, and live-streaming e-commerce."
He pointed to Sun Wukong's phone: "Those 698 monkeys of yours are not a burden, they're data traffic, they're real NPCs! The Monkey King's monkey troop is unique on the entire internet. Live-streaming the feeding of monkeys, the donations will be overwhelming."
Sun Wukong paused for a moment, then let out a short, mocking laugh:
"You, a mere mortal burdened with debt, dare to talk about developing my old Sun's territory? Do you even know how much it costs to develop a tourist attraction?"
"Didn't you just say that yourself?" Lin Chen stood up and patted Sun Wukong on the shoulder. "Even immortals have it tough."
He pointed to his chest, his tone frank: "And I, a mere mortal already owing four million two hundred thousand, am not afraid of things getting any worse."
Looking down at the "Great Sage, we're hungry" message still scrolling across Sun Wukong's phone screen, Lin Chen smiled, his tone becoming much more relaxed:
"The worst outcome is just continuing to be in debt, right? We're already so much in debt, a little more won't matter. But if it succeeds, haha!"
He held up two fingers:
"You can feed your monkeys, and I can pay off my debts. A win-win situation."
Sun Wukong stared at him for a long time, and Lin Chen thought he would refuse, or even kick him off the mountain with his staff.
But no, it didn't happen.
Sun Wukong gritted his teeth, thinking, "Since it's already like this, I might as well try anything. As long as I don't have to pay, I can give it a shot." His cheeks puffed out, as if he had made a huge decision.
Then a sentence popped out, the tone both reluctant and expectant:
"You brat... come back tomorrow at dawn and tell me your thoughts. If you dare to lie to me, I, Old Sun, will knock you back to the mortal realm with this stick, making your debts double!"
Lin Chen smiled; it seemed there was hope.